February

It's been the same old, same old around here. I've been getting very discouraged lately. This week it will come up a year since I was let go and I still don't have a full-time job. The best part of this month was going on a prayer retreat to well learn about prayer. I went up there early with my friend Steph. Despite 80 some people on the retreat, we got a room to ourselves. That was pretty sweet because when you have a room full of girls it's hard to coordinate bathroom times. We got to know the leadership team beforehand and it was fun getting to know the intern worship duo. I really like their music style.

That Saturday was fun because I got to play games. We were pretty rowdy and even got the table next to us wondering what we were playing. Spot It is very simple, but you have to be quick with catching similar objects and they make it tricky enough to where you really have to study the card sometimes.

Despite learning about prayer and the benefits it has-sometimes when you have too much information it kind of throws you for a loop and wonder how the heck to do it. The bottom line is that God wants you to communicate with him no matter how simple of a prayer. One thing I did learn for sure was that I need to do a freedom/7 step prayer. This you go through with an experienced prayer partner and help you break bad habits/thoughts, etc. When you have thirty years plus years of crap to go through, it can take almost a full day. At least, that is what I have heard.

Lately, I've been going through a big Leonardo DiCaprio obsession. One, he does remind me a little of Faron so that's part of it. (On the other hand, I haven't really thought about him too much). Second, it's just a big fantasy to take me away from all the problems. A rejection? No problem, I can just go to a deserted island with Leo in a split second. The downside-it's not real. Sigh.

It's funny looking at pictures of him. He was really cute as a little kid and then he went through this awkward stage that everyone goes through. Now, he is very handsome and down to earth guy that you can't help but admire and a very talented actor. I just want to smooth out the wrinkle between his eyes in the worst way. I'm impressed that he went through all the teenage heartthrob phase and managed to come out drug free. It's very rare.

At the same time, it breaks my heart that stars like him probably won't be going to heaven. No matter how much good they can do, it still doesn't change that fact. I did read that he grew up Catholic so maybe, but only God knows their true heart.